Remember that song by Garth Brooks--Unanswered prayers? There is a line in it that says some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers. I already mentioned it once about a week ago about how I prayed for nothing more than to have a healthy baby. Of course, that didn't happen, but my unanswered prayer did turn out to be a gift unlike any other and better than I ever would have imagined. Not what I expected in the least, but the love, goodness and innocence that exudes from my child is better than anything I could ever have hoped for. (now when she hits her teens, we shall see if all that goodness and innocence stay intact, somehow I doubt it)
Speaking of Gifts, I highly recommend the books Gifts. There are two volumes. Volume one is a collection of short stories from moms and volume two is a collection of short stories from more moms, dad, therapists, family members, teachers, etc. You can buy the books at Amazon and other book stores. I have gotten several speciality books relating to Down syndrome from Amazon, some for me, some for Katie. I like that they had the variety that my local bookstore did not.
My parents have been wonderful to Katie. My mom has watched Katie since she was born. I couldn't have asked for a better person to watch her these last few years. Of course, my dad has been right there to help her too. They are retired so they spend lots of time swinging her and walking around the block with her. We are looking at childcare options now, just to get her exposed to other children and for her to develop a more structured routine so that when she goes to school in 6 months, she won't be shell shocked. The person having the hardest time letting her go has been me! I know that no one is going to care for and love my Katie like my mom. I am so blessed to have her so close to me. My brother doesn't live here, so she doesn't see her other grandchildren as often as she would like. I don't know what I would have done without them. Love you both dearly! Thank you for everything! My husband's parents both live several states away, so we don't have any immediate family here except for my parents. I wish that her other grandparents were here to so that she could soak up all of their loving all the time too!
I just wanted to say to my friends who are going through a difficult time right now---I love you guys. You know who I am talking to. There are some friends who are experiencing grief in their lives right at this moment. I wish that you weren't going through these difficult times. My heart aches for you and I am praying for you. I deal with grief routinely whether I want to or not. To those who do not know what to say to someone who has lost a loved one, just let the person know that you are thinking of them. You don't always have to say something. Sometimes it is just your touch on their shoulder, your hug, your eyes that can tell them what you aren't able to say. People can be really uncomfortable with grief. They feel like they shouldn't say anything because it might be the wrong thing to say. If you are ever in doubt, just tell the person you love them and that you are thinking of them. That is often all they need to hear or even all they can process at that moment. Just don't avoid them. That will make it even worse when you see them again. And it is ok to speak about the person that has left their life. Not talking about the person may make it seem like you have forgotten them. Let them know a good memory that you have. Don't ever tell the person that it has been a long enough time to grieve. One of my favorite quotes---"To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world." Remember that their world has been forever altered by their loss. Just be there for them in any way you can, whether it be a quick phone call, a two line note dropped in the mail, a meal, a hug, whatever you do best. They will remember your kindness.
So, its goodnight for me. I have got to start getting these posts written earlier. I am a night person, but I need to quit typing these posts right before I go to bed. I love me some good sleep! Thank goodness my little bug likes a good night sleep too!
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