Day 14: 31 for 21---Kids, kindness and kryptonite

Okay, so what does kryptonite have to do with Ds?  Hmm, I don't know...I just liked the word and I needed something that started with the letter k.  Then I got to thinking and yes, I could find an analogy that would go with that word.

My kid and others who share our special gene is the reason I am sharing her story.  I have had another person tell me recently about someone who is still having a hard time with their child's Ds diagnosis.  It takes time.  To those parents:  it will all work out in the end.  You child is a baby first over all things.  Love your child for just being part of your life.  That is what they need more than anything else at this point.  Our first year was full of so many different needs.  Needs that were more than just K's physical needs.  We had emotional and spiritual needs.  We had educational needs.  We had adjustment needs.  I found that they were all important, but they didn't compare to the need that my baby just needed to be loved on more. 

My baby isn't really a baby anymore, yet she is in so many ways.  She doesn't look like a baby.  She looks like a little girl now.  She is more alike than different from all the other kids her age.  No, all Down syndrome children are not the same.  They can share some of the same physical traits as other children with Ds, such as low setting ears, a single palmar crease, brush field spots on their eyes, and low muscle tone to name a few.  K looks like her brother, she looks like me and her dad.  There are so many different stereotypes out there about Ds.  No, she isn't always happy.  She has temper trantrums just like every other kid out there. 

Speaking of kids, they are a mixed bag of emotions just like we adults.  They can show great kindness and also show lots of meanness.  I have seen some great stories when it comes to our kiddos.  The football team that gives the kid with Ds the ball and lets him score and then both teams celebrate afterwards, the cheerleaders who started a special needs cheer group and they both go out to cheer together at games, the high schools that have started "buddy" clubs.  How awesome is that?  I want to believe that my daughter will be surrounded by kindness as she enters school, especially middle and high school.  I hope that we adults will have educated enough people that it hurts to make fun of people.  Of course, when the adults are making fun of the kids, then those same kids may follow that same path too. 

Kindness, when it happens and you are a witness to it, is a wonderful thing.  People want to be treated with respect.  Everyone wants to matter.  When was the last time you did something kind for someone else?  Kindness can come in a small package.  Holding the door for someone, letting the person at the checkout line who has 2 things to your 20 go ahead of you, complimenting someone on how they look, picking up the phone to say hello to an old friend, keeping your road rage contained to the thoughts in your head, on and on the list can go.  I am blessed that I see kindness all around me everyday.  I hope that you do too.  If not, share some of yours with those who don't have it. 

I keep telling Blake that it hurts to make fun of people.  I ask him how he would feel if someone made fun of his sister.  He is at that age where he can make a difference with his peers and educate them about his sister and her diagnosis.  He must of been listening because he had some friends over and  K made one of her squinty eye faces and the kids laughed.  They weren't laughing at her, just that she looked funny doing it, but Blake didn't realize that.  He made me proud.  He told them to quit making fun of her, she couldn't help it.  I loved that he defended her so quickly, so fiercely.  I  hope that what I am saying to him does make a difference in how he would treat others around him.  Only time will tell.

So how does kryptonite fit into my post tonight?  Well, first you have to know what it is.  If you have ever heard of anything to do with Superman, then you know that this is what can kill him.  Words and how we act can be full of kryptonite.  How many times have we said something and it just crushes the other person?  Has someone ever said something to you and it hurt so deeply that you wondered if the pain would ever leave?  Think of those people who repeatedly put others down, who laugh at someone because they don't look the way they do, who thrive on throwing the kryptonite around.  We can't control others, so people are free to think and say what they want, but we can speak up when there is an opportunity to educate someone.  The kryptonite in this world will always be present as long as we live, but lets do our part in breaking up as much of it as we can.  The kids today can be the kindness of tomorrow or the holders of kryptonite--let's pray that the kindness always wins out.  Superman wouldn't want it any other way!